Dean Meets Lady Gaga@Red Sunset

[James Dean]

Red Sunset
47 Sydenham Rd
Marrickville

This is a review of Gaga. (To be referred to as Lady Gaga.)

Gaga is like her namesake in many ways. Let me first discuss how I see the ‘singer’ .Lady Gaga and then you will see how I view Lady Gaga the wl and why I consider this a dud punt.

Lady Gaga’s real name is Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta. Germanotta sounds like a bottled Italian soft drink made out of sauerkraut juice.

Lady Gaga the ‘singer’ can sing a bit, but that is not her outstanding feature. She clearly has a ego that would make Bob ‘Australia loves me’ Hawke look downright humble in comparison.

When you watch her perform the main element is Gaga herself. I honestly believe that when she opens the fridge door and the fridge light comes on she sings a medley of her ‘hits’. To steal a line from British Labour leader Clement Atlee, when referring to Winston Churchill, “She is so arrogant that if she hadn’t been born she thinks everyone would wonder why”.

She ponces around with all the intensity of those guys on TV cooking shows who spend 20 minutes frying an egg with all the seriousness of a neurosurgeon performing a brain operation.

Look at her in the link below. In her duet with Tony Bennett. He is like 800 years old and can’t remember the lyrics to a song he’s sung a thousand times, but he sells the song. Lady Gaga, in contrast, knows the words, but has that smug, self satisfied facial expression, not unlike those of George Bush used to get when he successfully finished a sentence without fucking it all up. She doesn’t sell the song. She sells Lady Gaga.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPAmDULCVrU

This brings us to Lady Gaga the working lady. She is in her mid 40’s, B cup teats, roundish and not unattractive face, with a trimmed reasonably tight pussy.

I started off by engaging in some small talk and things went downhill from there. I began by telling her how impressed I was with her fluent English and the following conversation ensued:

Gaga: I am from Hong Kong.
Dean: And?
Gaga: We were a British colony!
Dean: Really? I didn’t know the British spoke English.
Gaga: What?
Dean; That’s where Mao Zedong was born.
Gaga: He was not!
Dean: I mean Jackie Chan. I get them confused.

In short, I found Gaga to be real pain in the arse. I know it would have been worse if she had been a pre op, active tranny. So, I count my blessings.

Actually, if she had had a better personality, it would not have been too bad. Her bbj was fine and her pussy reasonably tight.

Now, I am not a guy going to brothels to look for a wife, but when I find them so arrogant it does turn me off.

I eventually came in her mouth.

She seemed to think I liked her as she told me how she worked at Pillow Top in Penrith under the name CiCi and her pic was on their website.

When I mentioned a ‘new’ girl at Red Sunset named Linda, Gaga immediately began to trash her.

In the end we had this final exchanged:

Gaga: You know I work at Pillow Top in Penrith too.
James: Glad you told me.
Gaga: Why?
James: So I can avoid the joint.

Well, I’ve got to go now.

I am smart enough to know when I am wearing out the welcome mat.

See you again soon.

Until that time mates . . .until that time.

James